To Everyone Just Trying to Live One Day at a Time

I’m sorry. I’m right there with you. It hurts. And it’s ok to say it’s really hard. Even if others have it worse, your pain still matters and is real.

The phrase goes “without your health, you have nothing.” Ouch. Well I’ve had to fight that phrase a lot lately. I may have some rough stuff going on, but I still do have something. It’s so simple, and of course we know the answer, but it’s the only answer that will ever matter.

Only Jesus.

When life is really hard and our faith is tested, we cling to that name. We recite what we know to be true about him. Literally. I’ve paced my kitchen telling God who he is out loud, through the tears, drowning out the fear, confusion, pain, worry, feelings. I need to speak what is 100% true, no matter how I’m feeling that day. I meditate on the character of God. I look for him in every word of Scripture. This is the only place I can find true hope. And hope brings relief.

As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
    When can I go and meet with God?
My tears have been my food
    day and night,
while people say to me all day long,
    “Where is your God?”
These things I remember
    as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go to the house of God
    under the protection of the Mighty One
with shouts of joy and praise
    among the festive throng.
Why, my soul, are you downcast?
    Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
    for I will yet praise him,
    my Savior and my God.
 By day the Lord directs his love,
    at night his song is with me—
    a prayer to the God of my life.
Psalm 42:1-5,8

When faced with the unimaginable that we thought only happened to other people, we have to trust what we really believe. Is our faith just something we know and say we believe, or is it deep in our being that even if this is all I have left, it is enough. God is enough for me.

God is enough for me today, and still will be enough tomorrow. That’s all I need to know right now. Breathe.

God doesn’t want to see us in pain. But he does want to be close to us. He wants us to know him. Times of hardship can draw us in in ways we didn’t think we needed. On good or normal days, we tend to think our faith or our relationship with God is fine. Sure I could probably read the Bible more, or pray more, but I know God loves me. But when something knocks us off our feet, we need him so much more. We know we can’t get by one more minute without him keeping us going. Breathe. Grace. He gives us strength. Breathe.

We see we are truly reliant on him every moment of our lives, whether in good times or crisis. We are humbled and trust to walk with him through it.

We don’t have to know the plan or how to work this out. As the wise words of a song in Frozen 2 say, “do the next right thing.” 

People say the Israelites ‘wandered’ for 40 years in the desert, but as I read the Word, I see something else. They weren’t wandering, they were following. God led them in fire and cloud, and he spoke personally to Moses. They were just being obedient.

On the day the tabernacle, the tent of the covenant law, was set up, the cloud covered it. From evening till morning the cloud above the tabernacle looked like fire... Whether the cloud stayed over the tabernacle for two days or a month or a year, the Israelites would remain in camp and not set out; but when it lifted, they would set out. At the Lord’s command they encamped, and at the Lord’s command they set out. They obeyed the Lord’s order, in accordance with his command through Moses.

Numbers 9:15, 22-23

It may have looked like fruitless wandering to others, and may have felt like it to the Israelites themselves, but they did it (even through countless stories of grumbling, repentance, doubting, and returning). 

You can get through today. You can follow his steps in obedience, even if you only see one at a time. Even if you follow with a sad heart. Feelings can change, and God works wonders on broken people. No matter how we come to God, he can take it and will continue to stay with you.

Then Job replied:
“Even today my complaint is bitter;
his hand is heavy in spite of my groaning.
If only I knew where to find him;
    if only I could go to his dwelling!
I would state my case before him
    and fill my mouth with arguments.
But he knows the way that I take;
    when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.
My feet have closely followed his steps;
    I have kept to his way without turning aside.
  I have not departed from the commands of his lips;
    I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread.
Job 23:1-4, 10-12

We learn to rely on God for everything and love and trust him in that. As many followers of Jesus began to question his hard teachings, his disciples stuck with him. Though they certainly didn’t understand everything Jesus was telling them, they knew his character and saw from his life and words that he could be trusted. He was worth whatever they would face in the days to come.

From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him.

“You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve.

Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.  We have come to believe and to know that you are the Holy One of God.”

John 6:66-69

And as the Easter Son rose, those disciples began to see that Jesus was the fulfillment of everything they were looking for - the long-awaited, desperately needed Savior!

We know the answer to our problems and our negative feelings. Jesus.

But what are we regularly turning to instead? We say we’re coping or practicing self-care, (which I am all for!) but we must make sure God is part of that. No amount of Netflix, bubble baths, or deep breathing will help us if we’re not honestly in connection with God.

Make a playlist. I love worship music and desperately need God’s truth in my ears throughout my day. I make different Christian music playlists for uptempo praise, songs for when I’m crying out from the pit, or favorites that I need sung over me when I can’t sing along myself. Music affects your mood, your mind, and your health, so feed it with the truth.

Get in the Word. When you don’t feel well, sitting down at a desk with a heavy Bible doesn’t always sound great. It may even sound like a chore. So then listen to it. The Bible app will read Scripture to you on those days you just can’t read it yourself. No shame. Let an old man with a deep, God-like voice speak truth over you. 

Pick a Gospel to hear about Jesus, follow stories according to the church year (like the passion stories during Lent or Jesus’ birth at Advent and Christmas), hear a letter of encouragement from Paul, dive into the pain with Job’s story, see a silent but behind-the-scenes God at work in Ruth’s story, let the Psalms with all the emotions roll. 

While it’s easy to just let mindless TV shows autoplay (and if you need to laugh, please find something that helps you there), at some point we know we’re just numbing. Even if we switch to mindlessly letting the Words of the Bible be spoken over us, there is power in those words, and I believe something good will come of it, whether our hearts and minds are all there at the moment or not.

Your word is a lamp for my feet,
    a light on my path.
I have taken an oath and confirmed it,
    that I will follow your righteous laws.
I have suffered much;
    preserve my life, Lord, according to your word.
Accept, Lord, the willing praise of my mouth,
    and teach me your laws.
Though I constantly take my life in my hands,
    I will not forget your law.
The wicked have set a snare for me,
    but I have not strayed from your precepts.
Your statutes are my heritage forever;
    they are the joy of my heart.
My heart is set on keeping your decrees
    to the very end.
Psalm 119:105-112

Pray all day. Schedule a time. Make a war room where you go to be with God. Write your prayers in a journal. Speak the name of Jesus out loud throughout your day. Talk to God while doing something physically mindless like the dishes or going on a walk. Write names of people or things you’re praying for on your bathroom mirror with a whiteboard marker or on post-its.  Relationships take work and intention. How are you really doing with God?

Cry it out. It’s ok and can be so cleansing. Yell at God your confusion, pain, and fears. He can take it, and you can’t keep it inside forever. 

Connect with others. Telling your story of pain to multiple people over time can get very tiring and hard. You choose who needs to know what, but lately I’ve found such solace with knowing how many people around me are actively praying and caring. And if you’re in a more positive place to be that helper for someone else, reach out and let your prayers be known. 

If you’re living just one day at a time, know that the Spirit is living in you too. He sees and is giving you the strength you need for today. Daily bread. Manna in the wilderness. He will always be enough.