“Fear the Lord and shun evil.” At my lowest point, when my heart felt like it was crumbling, my initial reactions were evil. I was angry, defiant, confused, and unaccepting of God’s will. I thought I knew what was best for me. I thought my life should have been going down a different path, down the path I thought looked safe, welcoming, and easy to maneuver.
I firmly believed that I could still go down that path, even if God was planning to close the gate to it. I thought I was in control.
However, that was not the case. Now that time has separated me from that treacherously awful week, I understand that the path I thought looked welcoming maybe wasn’t as inviting as it appeared. Maybe it wouldn’t have been the worst path, but it surely would not have been as lovely as the one I was directed to by God. What I deemed to be the best future for me simply wasn’t. Because I struggled and because my heart broke, my relationship with my Father grew as he comforted me.
The path he led me to, led me to Him.
Rather than focusing on an earthly relationship, I now focus on the most important relationship in my life - the one I have with my Savior. The Holy Spirit has spurred me on in my faith. I now devour His Word, speak with Him more often in prayer, and trust His plan more than I ever have before.
I can see that in growing in my relationship with Him, my relationship with myself has also changed. One of the worst days - worst weeks, really - of my life has been one of the best things that has happened to me. Through it, God has made me stronger, wiser, more patient, and more understanding. While a healthy, loving, and Christ-centered relationship with a man is one of God’s greatest gifts to us, it is not His only gift to us. Being single is a blessing, too.
Sisters, if you’re single, enjoy it. Embrace it. Rock it. Praise your heavenly Father with it. Pray for your future husband. Pray for patience to trust God’s timing. Serve your Savior with the position he has put you in right now - don’t wait for your future imperfect dreams.
Ladies, if you’re married, enjoy it. Embrace it. Rock it. Praise your heavenly Father with it. Pray for your husband. Pray for patience to trust God’s timing. Serve your Savior with your role. Be an example for other women of what God desires marriage to be - emulate that love abounds between you and your husband because Christ’s love is your foundation.
For all of God’s daughters, if you focus on your relationship with your Father first, your relationship with others will come naturally and at the right time. Purposefully meditate on God’s Word, call on Him in prayer, and praise Him with your life. Your love for your Creator will be obvious and that love will fuel the love you have for others here on this earth. In all things, trust His wisdom and allow Him to guide your steps.
God answered my prayer: “No.” He’s got something else, something better planned for me. The man I was after hasn’t spoken to me since, other than a quick “hello,” but I do see him around campus sometimes. Honestly, it’s still painful to see him. However, when I begin to feel my heart breaking, I now pray:
“Dear Lord, bring me hardship, bring me pain, bring me trials, and break my heart so that I may never lose my zeal for you. I will trust your will. I will trust your timing. I will trust your plan.”
And you know what? The pain always lessens right away because God’s timing, God’s plan, and God’s love are enough.