ONE DAY...
I love the times when my husband and I can talk… like really talk. Neither of us distracted by a TV show, work emails, our phones or a little boy running wild around the house. I love it even more when we get past “How was your day?” and “What are we doing this weekend?” and can truly connect. (In other words, remember all the reasons why we liked each other in the first place before the demands of a house and a kid and stressful jobs almost made us forget.)
Our conversations just about always lead us to dreaming of the future.
One day when the house is done…
One day when we are past the crazy little kid years…
One day when we can find the time, money (and frankly the energy) to go on vacations…
One day…
I have so many hopes and dreams for the future and that’s not a bad thing by any means… but sometimes the unspoiled possibilities of the future are honestly the only thing that gets me through the day.
When my three-year-old is throwing a tantrum because I won’t let him use a knife to help make dinner (I know, I’m such a mean mom).
When I just want to cry after paying the big bills like daycare for the month.
When I’m already running late for work and little boy’s entire bowl of oatmeal dumps on the floor.
It’s times like this that make me want to escape the present and think about “one day.”
Mamas, this season of our lives is just hard, plain and simple. Children are a wonderful gift, but those precious gifts of ours bring doubt, worry, fear and overwhelming stress with them into our lives. These little gifts of ours have us questioning our abilities, our choices and definitely our sanity each and every day. If your present situation is anything like mine, it’s a messy house that you just cleaned, a healthy meal that you were just about to pat yourself on the back for making until your child pushed it away in disgust, and falling asleep during that movie you’ve really been looking forward to watching because you’re just so dang tired. And so sometimes you can’t help but think of that less-crazy day in the seemingly distant future.
One day…
When perhaps we’ve moved on to a new house that doesn’t need so much work, but it won’t be the house that my baby took his first steps in.
When my son is older and more independent, and too big to wrap his arms and legs around me in a big bear hug.
When I pick him up from school and we can talk about a day free from timeouts because he was naughty, but his whole face doesn’t light up when he sees me walk through the door.
Sometimes I cling so desperately to the future and some of the small freedoms that I’ll win back over time (like a day I can take a shower without someone needing something the moment I step in) that I don’t give nearly enough worth to all the wonderful, incredibly special things that come from this stage of life. As hard as it is to read “Goodnight, Goodnight Construction Site” with enthusiasm for the tenth night in a row and wait for my commentator to finish ad-libbing before I turn each page, there will be a day that I miss it. As much as I’d love to start a Saturday morning with an uninterrupted cup of coffee, there will be a day when my son won’t want to start his weekend by cuddling with mama and I’ll give anything to go back for just one more sweet snuggle.
And ultimately clinging to the future is flawed in more ways than one. Yes, the future is full of wonderful possibilities, but life on this earth will never be picture-perfect. The future, just like the present, will come with its own set of stressful demands, challenges and moments of pure joy; they’ll just look different. No stage in life will ever look exactly how we dreamed it to be.
The real problem is clinging to a future that doesn’t involve looking past this sinful world. While we can dream about what the future might bring for us in our lifetimes, it’s the future that awaits us after our earthly lives have come to an end that we really need to focus on.
Long days filled with work and a cranky kid and all the extra things that life throws our way try to drown it out, but it’s the spiritual well being of our family that really matters. It’s the one thing that shouldn’t change during any stage of life. So yes, I’m still looking forward to “one day.”
One day when I see my child confirm his faith in front of our church…
One day when he teaches his own children our bedtime prayer…
One day when we’re all together in heaven because he knows his Savior...
That is the future I cling to. It will mean that I’ve done the most important job that God has set me on this earth to do.
Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. – Colossians 3:1-2
